“ Any customer can have a car painted any colour that he wants so long as it is black. ”

“ Wall Street is the only place that people drive to in a Rolls Royce to take advice from people who ride the subway. ”

“ I think it would be great to be born on Earth and die on Mars. Just hopefully not at the point of impact. ”

“ If you've been playing poker for half an hour and you still don't know who the patsy is, you're the patsy. ”

“ It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age. ”

“ Never ask a barber if you need a haircut. ”

“ You can't produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant. ”

“ You never know who's swimming naked until the tide goes out. ”

“ There seems to be some perverse human characteristic that likes to make easy things difficult. ”

“ No matter how great the talent or efforts, some things just take time. You can't produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant. ”

“ When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. ”

“ Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination. ”